The doctoral project is different than a PhD dissertation. Where a PhD dissertation can be up to 500 pages, this is ONLY 35 pages. It is an article that has original research and ideas that is worthy of publication. The combined practicum and project are the core capstones of the program. the DMin is a practical degree, not a research degree at the PhD level. But, the work we produce is equal to that of the PhD.
Having said this, I need to find a focus.
1) I have thought for years that I would love to study the spiritual formation that a seminary student undergoes...some with joy and others with bitterness.......but this is quite broad.
2) Church of the Brethren spirituality within our rituals of Love Feast and Service
3) Spiritual Formation within the history and current life of the Bethany Church of the Brethren
4) Individual practices of spiritual formation and the affect of that practice on the greater community of faith
The courses that I will want to take and the focus on my practicum need to be able to be tied to the final project.....for my own sense of research. Any others out there?
Thursday, November 8, 2007
Doctoral Practicum
Well, one of the things I get to do is a 400plus hour practicum. This can be in my current ministry setting......student development @bethany........or in my congregation. Hmmmm, lets think about some ideas:
1) a small group of students from each year (junior, middler, senior) to explore their spiritual formation during their seminary careers thus far, with the planning and leading of an overnight retreat involving silence, direction, worship and discussion for first year students (this one would have to be done with explicit support and permission by our ministry formation professor as it overlaps with that program...probably faculty approval as well)
2) a small group series with my congregation of spiritual formation practices, ending in a retreat i.e. the one in #1
3) overnight retreats for various faith communities in the CoB i.e. rural, city, large, small.....
4) ????????
Any suggestions? The requirements are that within 400 hours, I plan, lead and reflect on spiritual formation events/series/sermons/ etc........
1) a small group of students from each year (junior, middler, senior) to explore their spiritual formation during their seminary careers thus far, with the planning and leading of an overnight retreat involving silence, direction, worship and discussion for first year students (this one would have to be done with explicit support and permission by our ministry formation professor as it overlaps with that program...probably faculty approval as well)
2) a small group series with my congregation of spiritual formation practices, ending in a retreat i.e. the one in #1
3) overnight retreats for various faith communities in the CoB i.e. rural, city, large, small.....
4) ????????
Any suggestions? The requirements are that within 400 hours, I plan, lead and reflect on spiritual formation events/series/sermons/ etc........
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
This Mother's Lament
This is a personal lament that I wrote in response to a lecture and discussion on the Psalms.
O God, Source of life, creator of every living thing, determiner of that which has breath.
How long must we wait?
By day, my son writhes in pain,
gut clutched by little hands that should be drawing pictures or building cities with blocks.
Caught by rhythmic and cyclical mystery that causes him to moan, and for me to murmur reassurances that are false, echoing through a tunnel of hollow hope.
My hands lay upon his skin, providing both of us with the comfort of the other.
By night, I lay beside him, tears streaming down my face as he fitfully sleeps.
I stretch out my hand to you and cry “Heal him. I know that you can. I know who you are. Why are you not listening and acting? What have I done to block your hearing? I preach your word, I live a life of gospel simplicity, I set aside family time when neighbors knock on the door asking for bread. It is my turn, I ask for the bread of wholeness and you have given me a stone of indifference. How long O God?”
But my cries lift with faith, only to dissipate like steam, unfelt by you.
O God, Source of life and all that breathes, I must turn to lesser gods of white coat and stethoscope. They placate me with words like “could be this”, “isn’t that”, “flu, IBS, imagination.”
But they are not around to see my son, my firstborn in anguish.
I know his imaginary pains that are given life to garner my attention.
I know the pains that diminish when a friendly face appears or ice cream is brought out. And these are not those.
Will this end in health or death? How long until we know?
O that it would be better that you were not in existence, for then my hopes and faith would not be beaten to a pulp each and every day.
But you do exist, and I do believe. So I raise my petition, my yearning, my soul to you. Please heal my son. Heal my son. Do not be far from us. Let him not lose faith in you. Let not my faith shrivel and my vocation become meaningless.
Within me, praise struggles to rise, but it is held back and I cannot let it go. It flutters inside and beside and all around, but cannot fly to full glory. It is tethered to me, waiting for you to prove yourself.
(August 1996, during a 9 month period where Turner had recurring abdominal cramps that came and went in two week cycles. The doctors speculated that it was the flu, that it was Irritable Bowel Syndrome, that he was making it up. On October 25, 1996, while doing the second shunt revision of the year, they swabbed the tubing at his belly, to find his peritoneum full of staph infection, having traveled upwards to his brain. Turner was in ICU for 16 days, as they administered antibiotics from an external shunt directly into his brain. We watched his cerebral spinal fluid fill bag after bag, because his body did not reabsorb it. Turner was 5 nearly 6, lying in a hospital bed, unable to move for the need to keep that bag perfectly aligned with his head….too high and his cerebral spinal fluid would not drain out, too low and it could drain too quickly. He went home on the 17th day, with no more cramps. All along, God had been faithful. We knew it had been the shunt. But we listened to the empty reassurances of the gods of medicine over the heartbeat of the One True God.)
Starting the DMin (Doctor of Ministry)
Most of the blog posts from here on out will be about this DMin process and its impact upon my own spiritual development.......changes are a brewin..........
The day arrived to pack my bags and drive to Decatur Georgia for my doctoral work. We have a group of 12 pastoral leaders (some congregational ministers, some administrators) who are hear because we want to be. We've had a couple of days of introductory sessions, but are shifting gears toward the academic thinking that goes into this program.
My mates in this venture are from many denominational backgrounds: Presbyterian, Methodist, Anglican, Quaker and Church of the Brethren (me). But all have a deep love for those with whom we minister, and a desire to further their spiritual formation.
And that is what this is all about: Group Spiritual Formation. What is that? Well, maybe I'll let you know next week. Really. What I know now is that it is about how we move together in our lives of faith, growing, deepening, and being shaped. Spirituality is under the clear canopy of Christianity. Not much room for New Age, or eastern practices here. Spirituality in this context is specific to Christ's Church and those who follow his teachings.
I'm here from November 5-17....missing my family (I just now took 15 minutes to call and hear their voices: Kurt, Turner and Bennett....my heart's desires)....but really really glad to be taking this time just for me. Selfish I know......but so worth it.
Nothing pithy or deep to add.
asgr
The day arrived to pack my bags and drive to Decatur Georgia for my doctoral work. We have a group of 12 pastoral leaders (some congregational ministers, some administrators) who are hear because we want to be. We've had a couple of days of introductory sessions, but are shifting gears toward the academic thinking that goes into this program.
My mates in this venture are from many denominational backgrounds: Presbyterian, Methodist, Anglican, Quaker and Church of the Brethren (me). But all have a deep love for those with whom we minister, and a desire to further their spiritual formation.
And that is what this is all about: Group Spiritual Formation. What is that? Well, maybe I'll let you know next week. Really. What I know now is that it is about how we move together in our lives of faith, growing, deepening, and being shaped. Spirituality is under the clear canopy of Christianity. Not much room for New Age, or eastern practices here. Spirituality in this context is specific to Christ's Church and those who follow his teachings.
I'm here from November 5-17....missing my family (I just now took 15 minutes to call and hear their voices: Kurt, Turner and Bennett....my heart's desires)....but really really glad to be taking this time just for me. Selfish I know......but so worth it.
Nothing pithy or deep to add.
asgr
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
A first time.........
This morning, I sat on our deck overlooking our back yard, for an hour of prayer. I'm not a nature lover per se. I enjoy nature from the view of my office window mostly. But this day, I was participating in a world wide hour of prayer to connect with and heal the earth. It was called Fire the Grid. As I anticipated this event, I wondered how I would ever fill an hour with prayer in nature?
My prayers were of connection. Claiming the one who empowers me, Jesus the Christ, and respectfully acknowledging all how join this time of prayer from whatever tradition they pray from. Prayers of unity, of earth love, of respect for the Source of Life who creates all.
It was a powerful and joyful experience. Truly. Wow. Who knew?
At first, it was about watching the playful birds: a swoop of red from the cardinal, calling back and forth, silence when the cat strolled through.......
Then it was about thoughts of love. Not random romantic notions, but love...deep and purposeful and earth shattering.....like that between parent and child, lovers, friends.........
At some point, my body and spirit began to lighten and relax, deepen and wait. And then the oddest thing happened.
An old prayer language that I used way back in college days (during my charismatic exploration days) bubbled right up and overflowed from my mouth. This language has always struck me as being similar to a Native American or Hawaiian tribal tone. As always, I vocalized the word glyphs rising from inside/outside.......until it was done. Then, as always, sitting until interpretation comes. Like the oily warmth of a massage therapists hands moving from lower back to upper shoulders, the understanding that I had just spoken these words ebbed over me, "Holy holy holy. Holy Jesus."
Now, I am not a "Jesus thumper". I most often use the term "Christ" to depict something more cosmic than "Jesus" which is too solid and point-in-time-ish. But this was the interpretation and I'm sticking with it. Great peace followed.
Then, the words to a familiar hymn rose from within and I sang:
For the beauty of the earth
For the glory of the skies
For the love which from our birth
Over and around us lies.
Source of all to thee we raise
This our hymn of grateful praise.
What a morning.
amysgr
My prayers were of connection. Claiming the one who empowers me, Jesus the Christ, and respectfully acknowledging all how join this time of prayer from whatever tradition they pray from. Prayers of unity, of earth love, of respect for the Source of Life who creates all.
It was a powerful and joyful experience. Truly. Wow. Who knew?
At first, it was about watching the playful birds: a swoop of red from the cardinal, calling back and forth, silence when the cat strolled through.......
Then it was about thoughts of love. Not random romantic notions, but love...deep and purposeful and earth shattering.....like that between parent and child, lovers, friends.........
At some point, my body and spirit began to lighten and relax, deepen and wait. And then the oddest thing happened.
An old prayer language that I used way back in college days (during my charismatic exploration days) bubbled right up and overflowed from my mouth. This language has always struck me as being similar to a Native American or Hawaiian tribal tone. As always, I vocalized the word glyphs rising from inside/outside.......until it was done. Then, as always, sitting until interpretation comes. Like the oily warmth of a massage therapists hands moving from lower back to upper shoulders, the understanding that I had just spoken these words ebbed over me, "Holy holy holy. Holy Jesus."
Now, I am not a "Jesus thumper". I most often use the term "Christ" to depict something more cosmic than "Jesus" which is too solid and point-in-time-ish. But this was the interpretation and I'm sticking with it. Great peace followed.
Then, the words to a familiar hymn rose from within and I sang:
For the beauty of the earth
For the glory of the skies
For the love which from our birth
Over and around us lies.
Source of all to thee we raise
This our hymn of grateful praise.
What a morning.
amysgr
Thursday, June 14, 2007
saving souls? discipleship?
I was not brought up in, nor live in a religious culture of saving souls. The Church of the Brethren is a simple living, earthy, common sense discipleship sort of denomination. I think back over my life, and see so many hands involved in my faith development.........some very wise of mind persons, and some very wise of living persons. Deep in my core, my discipleship has bloomed and affects the outer parts of my being. There is nothing shallow there. That is not to say that I am not shallow. I can be as shallow as the next person.
As I read and meditate upon Matthew 25:30ff (the parable that Jesus tells that puts himself as the main character, sitting high on a throne separating sheep from goats, the doers from the ignorant) I am more and more drawn to the theological understanding that the confusion of those for whom Christ lavishes praise is based on the fact that they didn't know they were serving Christ, didn't know they were meeting some need, didn't know that they were accomplishing anything.
This 'not knowing' is key to the parable. When was the last time that someone you cared about was ill, was in financial trouble, had a relational crisis? Your response would be to support, see them through it, provide a few meals, maybe pay a couple of bills.........with no thought as to your own reward. Then months or years later that person sits with you and says "I just wanted to let you know that I wouldn't have been able to get through that bad patch without you. Thank you." We are often stunned by such commentary......we don't know what they are talking about. We simple did what was part of the relationship to do.
And that is the other key.
Christ calls us into relationships.......not to simply support and care for our friends, but to engage with all of God's children who are brought into our lives, in deep relationship. Those in the parable who are cast out are the ones who didn't get the connection between themselves and Christ, themselves and their neighbor, themselves and God's wide creation. They didn't get beyond their own nose.
Truly, it is in the relationships and the connection that we find God, Christ, one another. In that finding, we save our souls. Here and now. Yes, sure in the eternal to come as well. But right now we can live a life of abundance and connectedness. Ah, how glorious.
amsgr
As I read and meditate upon Matthew 25:30ff (the parable that Jesus tells that puts himself as the main character, sitting high on a throne separating sheep from goats, the doers from the ignorant) I am more and more drawn to the theological understanding that the confusion of those for whom Christ lavishes praise is based on the fact that they didn't know they were serving Christ, didn't know they were meeting some need, didn't know that they were accomplishing anything.
This 'not knowing' is key to the parable. When was the last time that someone you cared about was ill, was in financial trouble, had a relational crisis? Your response would be to support, see them through it, provide a few meals, maybe pay a couple of bills.........with no thought as to your own reward. Then months or years later that person sits with you and says "I just wanted to let you know that I wouldn't have been able to get through that bad patch without you. Thank you." We are often stunned by such commentary......we don't know what they are talking about. We simple did what was part of the relationship to do.
And that is the other key.
Christ calls us into relationships.......not to simply support and care for our friends, but to engage with all of God's children who are brought into our lives, in deep relationship. Those in the parable who are cast out are the ones who didn't get the connection between themselves and Christ, themselves and their neighbor, themselves and God's wide creation. They didn't get beyond their own nose.
Truly, it is in the relationships and the connection that we find God, Christ, one another. In that finding, we save our souls. Here and now. Yes, sure in the eternal to come as well. But right now we can live a life of abundance and connectedness. Ah, how glorious.
amsgr
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
striving after strivings
I seek to build a family of good people who desire to lift the veil of life's frustration and fear through the experience of poetic living and creative spiritualities. Old Guard and Gatekeepers need not apply.
~Travis Poling's blog Radical Pie
I read this a few weeks ago, and I keep finding myself returning to it. How do we know when we've become the gatekeeper or old guard? I want to know when I've arrived at being one who lifts the veil and lets down the guard. What happens if we just stumble into this new land, new family, and are not aware of it?
After I graduated from seminary and was in the pastorate, I began to recognize the community and education that was granted to me during my masters program. Was I just too in the middle to notice it while it was happening?
How do we know when we are just self satisfied, and when we've actually arrived at a place that we sought to create? Is there anything wrong with staying there for a little while? Taking deep breathes of the clear air, resting our muscles, shifting our gear.............in order to head out in a new way?
I think so. I think it is a beautiful thing to be in a place we thought we could only imagine. I would want that created place for others, too (their created place, not my created place...unless mine is theirs).........not just simply striving after strivings.....with no thought of arriving.
asgr
~Travis Poling's blog Radical Pie
I read this a few weeks ago, and I keep finding myself returning to it. How do we know when we've become the gatekeeper or old guard? I want to know when I've arrived at being one who lifts the veil and lets down the guard. What happens if we just stumble into this new land, new family, and are not aware of it?
After I graduated from seminary and was in the pastorate, I began to recognize the community and education that was granted to me during my masters program. Was I just too in the middle to notice it while it was happening?
How do we know when we are just self satisfied, and when we've actually arrived at a place that we sought to create? Is there anything wrong with staying there for a little while? Taking deep breathes of the clear air, resting our muscles, shifting our gear.............in order to head out in a new way?
I think so. I think it is a beautiful thing to be in a place we thought we could only imagine. I would want that created place for others, too (their created place, not my created place...unless mine is theirs).........not just simply striving after strivings.....with no thought of arriving.
asgr
CommonSense EveryDay Church
I was just reading Brian McLaren's website Deep Shift, with info about his EverythingMustChange tour.
Good stuff. Well, good stuff if you like change. If you like considering things deeply.
I do.
Our church is about to head into a deep shift. Here are a few of my untested, early articulated thoughts on church.........feel free to challenge or take me further along the road........
I dream of a church that comes together to worship and to be inspired........and then heads out into the community to "be". Not so much "do". There is doing in the being, but the primary work is to seize the who of who we are and then live it. Called to be a computer geek? Then do it with high standards, integrity, fairness. Called to work at a seminary? Then do it with high standards, integrity, sacred space. Called to teach? Teach well, grow your students. Called to do acupuncture? Then do it with a heart for the poor, the sick and not the bottom line. Called to work somewhere? Work well, be on time, demonstrate honesty and trustworthiness. Called to be a high school student who lives differently than your peers? Do it with style. Let others take note.
Our evangelism then comes when those we work with, impact and encounter say "Wow, you're different". Then we can explain why. We can then explain that we live another way, peacefully simply and together. That we are not into the behaviors of gossip, slander and hate..........that we revel in forgiving and being forgiven.....that while imperfect, we strive to be more attuned to the Holy.......that God is our center and reason for all things.
A church can have a soup kitchen, can have youth clubs, can women's fellowships: but if it isn't a common sense everyday church, it is nothing. Each one of us can evaluate the church programming to see if it is what the church needs to be. New paradigm, old paradigm......doesn't matter. As long as the church (local) is what God has called into being.
asgr
Good stuff. Well, good stuff if you like change. If you like considering things deeply.
I do.
Our church is about to head into a deep shift. Here are a few of my untested, early articulated thoughts on church.........feel free to challenge or take me further along the road........
I dream of a church that comes together to worship and to be inspired........and then heads out into the community to "be". Not so much "do". There is doing in the being, but the primary work is to seize the who of who we are and then live it. Called to be a computer geek? Then do it with high standards, integrity, fairness. Called to work at a seminary? Then do it with high standards, integrity, sacred space. Called to teach? Teach well, grow your students. Called to do acupuncture? Then do it with a heart for the poor, the sick and not the bottom line. Called to work somewhere? Work well, be on time, demonstrate honesty and trustworthiness. Called to be a high school student who lives differently than your peers? Do it with style. Let others take note.
Our evangelism then comes when those we work with, impact and encounter say "Wow, you're different". Then we can explain why. We can then explain that we live another way, peacefully simply and together. That we are not into the behaviors of gossip, slander and hate..........that we revel in forgiving and being forgiven.....that while imperfect, we strive to be more attuned to the Holy.......that God is our center and reason for all things.
A church can have a soup kitchen, can have youth clubs, can women's fellowships: but if it isn't a common sense everyday church, it is nothing. Each one of us can evaluate the church programming to see if it is what the church needs to be. New paradigm, old paradigm......doesn't matter. As long as the church (local) is what God has called into being.
asgr
Saturday, May 26, 2007
Support German proposal for emissions reduction
How do the people of the United States, get our leaders and the President to move toward the proposals of German Chancellor Angela Merkel for 50% reduction of carbon emissions by 2050. In a democracy, do the leaders lead out with the will of the people? What is the will of the American people when it comes to global warming?
Our family has already made changes toward this effort, by switching to compact florescent bulbs, reduction in electric clothes dryer use, banning the use of the dishwasher, driving a car that gets 38 mpg, keeping the car parked and taking bikes, open windows instead of using air conditioner......we have a long way to go for our family alone, but we are taking this very seriously.
It is an act of faith and stewardship of creation. We are not given the bounty and beauty of this good earth to do with as we please. We are to care for all things, all people. There is joy in living with alternative behaviors, even if there are less conveniences.
Life is good. Life is interesting.
asgr
Our family has already made changes toward this effort, by switching to compact florescent bulbs, reduction in electric clothes dryer use, banning the use of the dishwasher, driving a car that gets 38 mpg, keeping the car parked and taking bikes, open windows instead of using air conditioner......we have a long way to go for our family alone, but we are taking this very seriously.
It is an act of faith and stewardship of creation. We are not given the bounty and beauty of this good earth to do with as we please. We are to care for all things, all people. There is joy in living with alternative behaviors, even if there are less conveniences.
Life is good. Life is interesting.
asgr
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Oh Rosie and vitriolic diatribes
Now, I must first state that I do not watch TV on a regular basis. I find little there worth consuming my time. But yesterday, as I was on the internet, scanning the through some youtube videos on Jon Stewart from Comedy Centrals The Daily Show (which is the best show on Television), I came across a clip from this week's fracas between Rosie O'Donnell and Elizabeth Hasselbeck from the View.
During an episode this week, Rosie called Elizabeth on the carpet for not stepping up as a friend, when Rosie was needing to clarify her wording that insinuated that she thought the troops were terrorists. There was implication in her words, but her intent was to point the finger to President Bush and not the troops. During this particular episode of The View, Elizabeth put it back to Rosie that Rosie alone is responsible for clarifying her innuendos and thoughts.
It turned into a public fight, split screen to see both, with Rosie seemingly in control. And why wouldn't she have been? She knew that she was going to put Elizabeth on the defensive. Elizabeth was on the defensive.
I bring this up, solely because our culture and society have mistaken vitriolic/Springer-esque verbal attacks for public discourse. It is not a good or growing thing to watch two adults go after one another, no one listening, both talking over the other, both having valid points to make.
In this case, Rosie thought the whole thing was about a friend not sticking up for a friend. For Elizabeth, it seemed to be that she wanted to push Rosie on being an adult and taking consequences for her words.
It became about politics and mud slinging and no one heard the real issues. Elizabeth should simply say why she chose not to defend Rosie (which could be for any number of reasons), and Rosie needs to come to terms with the fact that if she digs a verbal hole, she must get herself out of it.
I yearn for adult discourse, where we can express hurt feelings without everyone going on the defensive. When we can open a can of worms and then hear what our friend has to say to us. Where we live to grow and learn and develop......which means listening and hearing.
There have been many times when I've given in to this type of tirade, sure of the rightness of my position. It is ugly, and it feels ugly, and then we have to go an clean up the relational mess.
Really, there are better ways.
Rosie and Elizabeth, get a mediator who will help you paraphrase, listen & hear one another.
As for the rest of us? Let's step up to the adult plate and be adults.
asgr
During an episode this week, Rosie called Elizabeth on the carpet for not stepping up as a friend, when Rosie was needing to clarify her wording that insinuated that she thought the troops were terrorists. There was implication in her words, but her intent was to point the finger to President Bush and not the troops. During this particular episode of The View, Elizabeth put it back to Rosie that Rosie alone is responsible for clarifying her innuendos and thoughts.
It turned into a public fight, split screen to see both, with Rosie seemingly in control. And why wouldn't she have been? She knew that she was going to put Elizabeth on the defensive. Elizabeth was on the defensive.
I bring this up, solely because our culture and society have mistaken vitriolic/Springer-esque verbal attacks for public discourse. It is not a good or growing thing to watch two adults go after one another, no one listening, both talking over the other, both having valid points to make.
In this case, Rosie thought the whole thing was about a friend not sticking up for a friend. For Elizabeth, it seemed to be that she wanted to push Rosie on being an adult and taking consequences for her words.
It became about politics and mud slinging and no one heard the real issues. Elizabeth should simply say why she chose not to defend Rosie (which could be for any number of reasons), and Rosie needs to come to terms with the fact that if she digs a verbal hole, she must get herself out of it.
I yearn for adult discourse, where we can express hurt feelings without everyone going on the defensive. When we can open a can of worms and then hear what our friend has to say to us. Where we live to grow and learn and develop......which means listening and hearing.
There have been many times when I've given in to this type of tirade, sure of the rightness of my position. It is ugly, and it feels ugly, and then we have to go an clean up the relational mess.
Really, there are better ways.
Rosie and Elizabeth, get a mediator who will help you paraphrase, listen & hear one another.
As for the rest of us? Let's step up to the adult plate and be adults.
asgr
Saturday, May 12, 2007
DMin
I've been accepted into the Doctor of Ministry program at Columbia Theological Seminary in Decatur GA. It took much longer to receive this word than I had anticipated, and by the time I did get the email saying "congratulations", I had moved past the excitement of being a doctoral student, and am in a much more balanced place of excitement for the learning.
This will impact my next 4 years, mightily.
asgr
This will impact my next 4 years, mightily.
asgr
Mothers Day.....Ack......
I've been a mother for 16 years now. I've read all of the trite and sentimental mush that gets circulated at mothers day. It is easy for me to continue in my disdain for overrated holidays, because my two boys make it easy.
The cooey emails about the toughness, gentleness, stalwartness....and other "nesses" of motherhood are all true. But reading them does not validate my parenting. Nor does it assure that just because I am a Mother, that I am any good at it.
So, this year, someone sent me a Mother's Day piece written by Anna Quindlan, one of my favorite writers. She is an author but is best known for her essays twice a month on the last page of Newsweek. Ms Quindlan bring intelligence to every topic she touches, knowledge and a cutting edge to everything she writes.
She did not cover new ground with this piece. In fact, it was much of the same old same old that has gone around before. A reminder to live now, in the moment, with one's children....because they will soon be gone. She just says it in a way that I can hear.
I thought about that. Almost every morning, I head to work 45 minutes early (when I could be sleeping in...which I love to do), just so that I can drop my 16 year old son off at choir and get to say "love ya" in that flippant way that a teenage boy can hear, but that conveys the depths of my love. My son has never said "love ya, too".....instead he says "have a good day". Often twice. There is deep abiding love that is transmitted in those 15 seconds that I would not trade for anything.
Our 13 year old son is a bit more pliable when it comes to daily loving expressions. He won't say the love words either.....I'm way over needing that.........but he lets me say them to him. He waits for me to say them to him. And he nods in my direction.
Daily. Everyday. My children hear that they are loved every single day of their lives. Sometimes twice. Sometimes I'm the only one who hears me say it, but I say it anyway. Why? Because I do love them. But more importantly, I know that a child's understanding of the Divine is often seated in their parental interaction. I want them to instinctively know that God loves them every day, all day, so that when it comes time to question their faith, the bible, God's existence, living moral lives, loving neighbor and enemy, that they have a foundation of knowing what it is like to be loved, simply because they exist in this world.
Simply because they exist.
They are loved.
By me.
Their Mom.
asgr
The cooey emails about the toughness, gentleness, stalwartness....and other "nesses" of motherhood are all true. But reading them does not validate my parenting. Nor does it assure that just because I am a Mother, that I am any good at it.
So, this year, someone sent me a Mother's Day piece written by Anna Quindlan, one of my favorite writers. She is an author but is best known for her essays twice a month on the last page of Newsweek. Ms Quindlan bring intelligence to every topic she touches, knowledge and a cutting edge to everything she writes.
She did not cover new ground with this piece. In fact, it was much of the same old same old that has gone around before. A reminder to live now, in the moment, with one's children....because they will soon be gone. She just says it in a way that I can hear.
I thought about that. Almost every morning, I head to work 45 minutes early (when I could be sleeping in...which I love to do), just so that I can drop my 16 year old son off at choir and get to say "love ya" in that flippant way that a teenage boy can hear, but that conveys the depths of my love. My son has never said "love ya, too".....instead he says "have a good day". Often twice. There is deep abiding love that is transmitted in those 15 seconds that I would not trade for anything.
Our 13 year old son is a bit more pliable when it comes to daily loving expressions. He won't say the love words either.....I'm way over needing that.........but he lets me say them to him. He waits for me to say them to him. And he nods in my direction.
Daily. Everyday. My children hear that they are loved every single day of their lives. Sometimes twice. Sometimes I'm the only one who hears me say it, but I say it anyway. Why? Because I do love them. But more importantly, I know that a child's understanding of the Divine is often seated in their parental interaction. I want them to instinctively know that God loves them every day, all day, so that when it comes time to question their faith, the bible, God's existence, living moral lives, loving neighbor and enemy, that they have a foundation of knowing what it is like to be loved, simply because they exist in this world.
Simply because they exist.
They are loved.
By me.
Their Mom.
asgr
Thursday, May 3, 2007
May Day and Cedar Trees
(this meditation was written by asgr for an evening meal gathering of women in our seminary community)
Hear the poetry of Harris Loewen........
O God great womb of wondrous love,
your spirit moving on the deep did wake the world within yourself
a pulsing lighted world from sleep
O Hearth O heartbeat of the whole
your dark light dance began the times, the days and seasons, seconds, years
the ages rhythms and the rhymes.
O fire, O firmament and sea
your seething ferment’s energy called forth a whirling waltz of life
each plant and creature and its seed.
Sisters. It is May day. It is a day of ancient memory. A creation day of dancing around May Poles and finding love. A day of joy. A day to celebrate the fertile garden that is the earth. The fertile soil that we each hold within us. A day to claim God’s holy fertility as the creator of all that is.
May Day falls midway between the Spring Equinox and the Summer Solstice. It falls midway in the year, across from the midpoint of the vernal Equinox and winter solstice, which marks the beginning of the dormant and shadowed time of year, when things go quiet and deep.....in preparation. May day, in its Mid-ness..... lifts high the banner of the sun, throwing off the veil of winter........urging us to move forward and into the fresh greening of the world.
How easy it is to revel in the planting, the sowing, the dreaming of fresh vegetables and fruits that are to come. How easy it is today, to think of culminations....culminations of classes, ministry settings, papers, first years, other years...... propelling us into time that is yet to come but is so near ripeness. The sap, deep in the trees has flowed its sweet treasures to entice us for months to come. The peonies tease us with their buds waiting to burst....needing yet another month of preparation. The soil hits our nostrils with the earthy scent of compost, dew, rich dirt and hope. A sight of anticipation for our eyes.
You.
Each you that sits in this circle.
Each one who sits here in exhaustion or doneness or still need to do-ness........you are precious and prized like first fruits of the season. You are God’s.
The book of the prophet Ezekiel brings us an image of creating abundance and Godly gardening.......an image that is purposefully stated in the face of those who have chosen to follow not God, but to make subcontracts with human authorities, selling their people, selling their heritage, selling their promise. Trading life for death. But lets put aside the actual context of this image. For the image itself is bursting with seasonal awakenings...greening of God’s calling, midway-ness of what has been and what is to be. Hear now from the prophet, the images from God.
God, our creator, says, “I personally will take a shoot from the top of the towering cedar, a cutting from the crown of the tree, and plant it on a high and towering mountain on the high mountain of Israel. It will grow putting out branches and fruit - a majestic cedar. Birds of every sort and kind will live under it. They’ll build nests in the shade of its branches. All the trees of the field will recognize that I, God, made the great tree small, and the small tree great, made the green tree turn dry and the dry tree sprout green branches. I, God said it - and I did it.”
We are the birds of every sort and kind, living within the branches of the majestic cedar. As the many hued ribbons of the May Pole, our sacred gifts and talents flow and invite others into God’s dance of creative life. Our faith is the nest that holds our soul’s home, safe in the cool shade of the tree that God brings forth from the solid mountainscape.
It is God who calls. God who transplants. God who sows with fertile faithfulness. It is the creator who restores the cold wintry season to a green landscape of bloom and abundance. It is the Creator who determines what lowly tree will prevail, and what stately tree will be brought low, what will be green and what will be dry.
Oh, you women of Creative, Fertile Faith. Oh we women of God. We are in the mid point of being transplanted, nourished. Always midway between this or that....moving with rhythms that we establish, and with those that we join. Be strong in your season of relationships with sisters and brothers that surround you to receive learning from you or to bring support to you. Be strong in your season of relationship with the One who assumes a majestic landscape of your ministry. ...the many sorts and kinds of ministries that pulsate with Holy Life. Lift your joyful spirits unto the Holy One, who is creating with you.
Hear the poetry of Harris Loewen........
O God great womb of wondrous love,
your spirit moving on the deep did wake the world within yourself
a pulsing lighted world from sleep
O Hearth O heartbeat of the whole
your dark light dance began the times, the days and seasons, seconds, years
the ages rhythms and the rhymes.
O fire, O firmament and sea
your seething ferment’s energy called forth a whirling waltz of life
each plant and creature and its seed.
Sisters. It is May day. It is a day of ancient memory. A creation day of dancing around May Poles and finding love. A day of joy. A day to celebrate the fertile garden that is the earth. The fertile soil that we each hold within us. A day to claim God’s holy fertility as the creator of all that is.
May Day falls midway between the Spring Equinox and the Summer Solstice. It falls midway in the year, across from the midpoint of the vernal Equinox and winter solstice, which marks the beginning of the dormant and shadowed time of year, when things go quiet and deep.....in preparation. May day, in its Mid-ness..... lifts high the banner of the sun, throwing off the veil of winter........urging us to move forward and into the fresh greening of the world.
How easy it is to revel in the planting, the sowing, the dreaming of fresh vegetables and fruits that are to come. How easy it is today, to think of culminations....culminations of classes, ministry settings, papers, first years, other years...... propelling us into time that is yet to come but is so near ripeness. The sap, deep in the trees has flowed its sweet treasures to entice us for months to come. The peonies tease us with their buds waiting to burst....needing yet another month of preparation. The soil hits our nostrils with the earthy scent of compost, dew, rich dirt and hope. A sight of anticipation for our eyes.
You.
Each you that sits in this circle.
Each one who sits here in exhaustion or doneness or still need to do-ness........you are precious and prized like first fruits of the season. You are God’s.
The book of the prophet Ezekiel brings us an image of creating abundance and Godly gardening.......an image that is purposefully stated in the face of those who have chosen to follow not God, but to make subcontracts with human authorities, selling their people, selling their heritage, selling their promise. Trading life for death. But lets put aside the actual context of this image. For the image itself is bursting with seasonal awakenings...greening of God’s calling, midway-ness of what has been and what is to be. Hear now from the prophet, the images from God.
God, our creator, says, “I personally will take a shoot from the top of the towering cedar, a cutting from the crown of the tree, and plant it on a high and towering mountain on the high mountain of Israel. It will grow putting out branches and fruit - a majestic cedar. Birds of every sort and kind will live under it. They’ll build nests in the shade of its branches. All the trees of the field will recognize that I, God, made the great tree small, and the small tree great, made the green tree turn dry and the dry tree sprout green branches. I, God said it - and I did it.”
We are the birds of every sort and kind, living within the branches of the majestic cedar. As the many hued ribbons of the May Pole, our sacred gifts and talents flow and invite others into God’s dance of creative life. Our faith is the nest that holds our soul’s home, safe in the cool shade of the tree that God brings forth from the solid mountainscape.
It is God who calls. God who transplants. God who sows with fertile faithfulness. It is the creator who restores the cold wintry season to a green landscape of bloom and abundance. It is the Creator who determines what lowly tree will prevail, and what stately tree will be brought low, what will be green and what will be dry.
Oh, you women of Creative, Fertile Faith. Oh we women of God. We are in the mid point of being transplanted, nourished. Always midway between this or that....moving with rhythms that we establish, and with those that we join. Be strong in your season of relationships with sisters and brothers that surround you to receive learning from you or to bring support to you. Be strong in your season of relationship with the One who assumes a majestic landscape of your ministry. ...the many sorts and kinds of ministries that pulsate with Holy Life. Lift your joyful spirits unto the Holy One, who is creating with you.
Monday, April 30, 2007
Collaborators
Yesterday, our retiring seminary president spoke eloquent words that are a vision that we can all live by.
He shared that 15 years ago, when he became president, a former president said this to him, "If it isn't broken, it doesn't come across the president's desk."
Our now retiring president interpreted this statement to us this way.......
The president must look up from her/his desk to see all that ISN'T broken. If they keep their gaze only on what is before them, they will think that the whole system is broken. When in fact, all these gifted people are doing what is their's to do and making it all work.
Amy's spin.........
We must continually look up from our own work, to see how and if we are still relevant to our surroundings. We must continually look up from our own work to see that others are are making the bigger picture work as well. It doesn't all rest on the shoulders of one or two, or the bosses or the administrative team.
The good of the whole rests in the workings of each of us .....connected.....collaborative.......accountable.......joyful.......... doing what is ours to do.
And doing it well.
asgr
He shared that 15 years ago, when he became president, a former president said this to him, "If it isn't broken, it doesn't come across the president's desk."
Our now retiring president interpreted this statement to us this way.......
The president must look up from her/his desk to see all that ISN'T broken. If they keep their gaze only on what is before them, they will think that the whole system is broken. When in fact, all these gifted people are doing what is their's to do and making it all work.
Amy's spin.........
We must continually look up from our own work, to see how and if we are still relevant to our surroundings. We must continually look up from our own work to see that others are are making the bigger picture work as well. It doesn't all rest on the shoulders of one or two, or the bosses or the administrative team.
The good of the whole rests in the workings of each of us .....connected.....collaborative.......accountable.......joyful.......... doing what is ours to do.
And doing it well.
asgr
Servant Leadership redux
At a recent conference in Toronto (lovely, wonderfully diverse Toronto!)....I heard Eddie Gibbs speak. He is a Brit, raised in post WWII Anglican England....and is a current authority on the emerging church and church growth. He is on faculty at Fuller Theological Seminary.
Immediately upon returning home, I had to buy his two books ChurchNext, and LeadershipNext. Excellent books.....and I'm only into the first couple of chapters of each. I'm a new Eddie Gibbs devotee.
One of the eye jolting awakenings that has come through his writing....is so simple. Yet, so right for what I'm needing to hear. He talks about how the church has gotten "servant leadership" all wrong, when we try to put that paradigm onto Jesus, in the way that we live it out today. He says that in today's culture, Servant Leadership is really Doormat Leadership. An attempt to meet the needs of all, putting our (ministering persons) own needs to the side. This leads to burnout and to leaving ministry altogether.
Gibbs says that Jesus never did servant leadership in that model. He was never a servant to the masses, in that he put everyone elses needs first. Jesus was a servant to God and God's call for his life. That is the statement that got me. Gibbs goes on to say that through Jesus' faithfulness to God's call through being a servant to God, Jesus did all that he was to do.
Now, we are not Jesus. I am not. You, dear reader, are not. We are not God incarnate. But, we are called to sacred work. The thing that we MUST see, is that we must stay fast to serving God....and sometimes that will be at odds with what the world AND the church sees as Christian ministry. We are not to be swerved. If we are all faithful to what God is claiming within us to do and be, then it will all get covered. We are to be collaborators, and not lone rangers. None of us can do it all, nor should we. What we should do (and this is a JOYFUL should) is to claim our part and do it well. Then, looking around, we can claim what others have been called to and find joy in their faithfulness.....even when it is something different that our own call.
Yes indeed. I'm jazzed.
asgr
Immediately upon returning home, I had to buy his two books ChurchNext, and LeadershipNext. Excellent books.....and I'm only into the first couple of chapters of each. I'm a new Eddie Gibbs devotee.
One of the eye jolting awakenings that has come through his writing....is so simple. Yet, so right for what I'm needing to hear. He talks about how the church has gotten "servant leadership" all wrong, when we try to put that paradigm onto Jesus, in the way that we live it out today. He says that in today's culture, Servant Leadership is really Doormat Leadership. An attempt to meet the needs of all, putting our (ministering persons) own needs to the side. This leads to burnout and to leaving ministry altogether.
Gibbs says that Jesus never did servant leadership in that model. He was never a servant to the masses, in that he put everyone elses needs first. Jesus was a servant to God and God's call for his life. That is the statement that got me. Gibbs goes on to say that through Jesus' faithfulness to God's call through being a servant to God, Jesus did all that he was to do.
Now, we are not Jesus. I am not. You, dear reader, are not. We are not God incarnate. But, we are called to sacred work. The thing that we MUST see, is that we must stay fast to serving God....and sometimes that will be at odds with what the world AND the church sees as Christian ministry. We are not to be swerved. If we are all faithful to what God is claiming within us to do and be, then it will all get covered. We are to be collaborators, and not lone rangers. None of us can do it all, nor should we. What we should do (and this is a JOYFUL should) is to claim our part and do it well. Then, looking around, we can claim what others have been called to and find joy in their faithfulness.....even when it is something different that our own call.
Yes indeed. I'm jazzed.
asgr
Friday, April 27, 2007
FSBO Richmond Indiana
Ok, shameless promotion here.....but its my blog and my house and a family dream.
We are selling our lovely, traditionally classic four square, two story home for $119,000. It has tile and hardwood floors, ceramic tile kitchen counters, lots of cooking and storage space in kitchen (room for two cooks), LR, DR, FR, main floor laundry, 1.5 baths, 3 bedrooms plus extra bedroom or office in basement (unfinished but quite usable), high efficiency furnace and central air on BOTH floors......with programmable thermostats.......energy saving/money saving. perennial beds, front porch, back deck, large fenced in back yard, two car detached garage and asphalt drive, established neighborhood with long time residents, mature trees, near beautiful Glen Miller Park, Golf course, Rose Garden, east side shops and restaurants. Stove, fridge and dishwasher (older model) stay.
We can help pay up to $2000 of buyer's closing costs if no realtor is part of the transaction.....this allows us to keep the price low and still meet our financial goals. We ask for one day notice for showing. Email us today!
We are selling our lovely, traditionally classic four square, two story home for $119,000. It has tile and hardwood floors, ceramic tile kitchen counters, lots of cooking and storage space in kitchen (room for two cooks), LR, DR, FR, main floor laundry, 1.5 baths, 3 bedrooms plus extra bedroom or office in basement (unfinished but quite usable), high efficiency furnace and central air on BOTH floors......with programmable thermostats.......energy saving/money saving. perennial beds, front porch, back deck, large fenced in back yard, two car detached garage and asphalt drive, established neighborhood with long time residents, mature trees, near beautiful Glen Miller Park, Golf course, Rose Garden, east side shops and restaurants. Stove, fridge and dishwasher (older model) stay.
We can help pay up to $2000 of buyer's closing costs if no realtor is part of the transaction.....this allows us to keep the price low and still meet our financial goals. We ask for one day notice for showing. Email us today!
Tuesday, April 3, 2007
outer courts
The outer courts
......its Sunday so I heard a good sermon.
I’m lucky that way. Many people do not hear good sermons. No, I’m not talking about those who don’t go to church. I’m talking about those who DO go to church. Too many sermons are written with a good heart and heartfelt intentions....but they lack scholarship and craft.
Today’s sermon was at the Monroeville Church of the Brethren near Pittsburgh. A colleague and I traveled for the weekend (I for fun with other friends, and he for work....poor guy), and this church was on our way home. The preacher was Scott Holland. Scott happens to be Professor of Public Theology and Peace Studies where I work.
The text was the palm Sunday text from Luke. But the kicker came at the end. Scott riffed on pluralism and openness and a a most interesting political season ahead. Then, he said that Jesus himself anticipated a church that was open and inviting to all. Maybe you know the story. Jesus comes into the temple in Jerusalem. His anger is ignited because of the commerce happening in the court. We have ALWAYS heard that Jesus’ anger was due to the lack of respect for God’s house. That they had turned the house of prayer into a den of thieves.
But, says Scott, the outer court was indeed the place for moneychangers, sellers of pigeons, doves and other sacrificial livestock....that was part of the deal in the temple. What incited his anger was the disrespect in the outer court. This was a place for the stranger. It was a place for the traveler. It was the place for the non Jews, the Gentiles, to be welcomed. The sellers and buyers and moneychangers had taken over the whole of this space, putting business before hospitality, moneymaking before the spirit of God;’s kingdom. He threw them out in anger because they did not keep safe a place for all.
Jesus creates space for all. The stranger, the traveler, the one outside of our own faith tradition and expression. This is the gospel. This is God’s realm.
I sit with this. For this is how I read the gospel. The Good News. It is not about “my” salvation.....but the making and saving of place for all. And I am one among many. Special in the living of my own life, yet part of the choir of faith. I like that.
And the outer court? Well, thats where the prodigal son’s father still waits with the willful son.....where God sits with us all.
Live well, Live Large
amysgr
......its Sunday so I heard a good sermon.
I’m lucky that way. Many people do not hear good sermons. No, I’m not talking about those who don’t go to church. I’m talking about those who DO go to church. Too many sermons are written with a good heart and heartfelt intentions....but they lack scholarship and craft.
Today’s sermon was at the Monroeville Church of the Brethren near Pittsburgh. A colleague and I traveled for the weekend (I for fun with other friends, and he for work....poor guy), and this church was on our way home. The preacher was Scott Holland. Scott happens to be Professor of Public Theology and Peace Studies where I work.
The text was the palm Sunday text from Luke. But the kicker came at the end. Scott riffed on pluralism and openness and a a most interesting political season ahead. Then, he said that Jesus himself anticipated a church that was open and inviting to all. Maybe you know the story. Jesus comes into the temple in Jerusalem. His anger is ignited because of the commerce happening in the court. We have ALWAYS heard that Jesus’ anger was due to the lack of respect for God’s house. That they had turned the house of prayer into a den of thieves.
But, says Scott, the outer court was indeed the place for moneychangers, sellers of pigeons, doves and other sacrificial livestock....that was part of the deal in the temple. What incited his anger was the disrespect in the outer court. This was a place for the stranger. It was a place for the traveler. It was the place for the non Jews, the Gentiles, to be welcomed. The sellers and buyers and moneychangers had taken over the whole of this space, putting business before hospitality, moneymaking before the spirit of God;’s kingdom. He threw them out in anger because they did not keep safe a place for all.
Jesus creates space for all. The stranger, the traveler, the one outside of our own faith tradition and expression. This is the gospel. This is God’s realm.
I sit with this. For this is how I read the gospel. The Good News. It is not about “my” salvation.....but the making and saving of place for all. And I am one among many. Special in the living of my own life, yet part of the choir of faith. I like that.
And the outer court? Well, thats where the prodigal son’s father still waits with the willful son.....where God sits with us all.
Live well, Live Large
amysgr
Saturday, March 24, 2007
...hmmmm, interesting
The Ritchie's have been on a quest for the perfect property. Last year at this time, we were hoping to sell our house to buy 3 acres and a quaint but in need of repair house. Didn't happen.
Today, we made an offer on 5 acres with a charming craftsman style bungalow (lead glass in the built ins and authentic stained glass in the windows). As we walked the land today with our two wonderful friends, what did we spy? Berries. Black, wine and rasp.....berries to behold. Well, at least we saw the canes that will hold the berries come summer. The property is crammed with heaven.
A new thing is breaking in. It springs forth already. We are actively perceiving it and acting on it.
.....yup, we still have to sell our house first. The boys pitched in tonight, by washing the dishes and cleaning the grout in the countertop tiles. Who knew they even noticed? What else do they see that I don't?
asgr
Today, we made an offer on 5 acres with a charming craftsman style bungalow (lead glass in the built ins and authentic stained glass in the windows). As we walked the land today with our two wonderful friends, what did we spy? Berries. Black, wine and rasp.....berries to behold. Well, at least we saw the canes that will hold the berries come summer. The property is crammed with heaven.
A new thing is breaking in. It springs forth already. We are actively perceiving it and acting on it.
.....yup, we still have to sell our house first. The boys pitched in tonight, by washing the dishes and cleaning the grout in the countertop tiles. Who knew they even noticed? What else do they see that I don't?
asgr
Thursday, March 22, 2007
berries of gratitude
I have the best friends on the planet. It has been a goal of mine to surround myself with individuals smarter than I am. I am more like Pooh than Einstein, but I am savvy enough to know it.
Today, I said goodbye (see previous blog) to Carrie and Torin. Smart, sharp, organized, brilliant.....they are moving to a new location and new job. I was so struck by how I was not sad. I was not sad....why the heck not? My bagel buddy would not be in town. My stalwart truth teller would be emails away. How could I not be sad? Well, because I was too busy being grateful and full of love.
Awww, you say.
No. Really. Grateful for powerful friends. Grateful for the impact they will have on a new church, an old denomination, a dawning day for religio-spirituality. Big impact. Like a meteor. And now I have a nifty place to visit for long weekends.
So later in the day.....another good friend stopped by. She is vim and vigor personified. 'Nuff said.
So, later after that......my long time friend who lives 5 hours away sent emails as she wrote soul stirring prose for publication about suffering, lent, and a four-legged 3 pronged clay thing that represent her family. (go to catapult.com for her soon to be printed article)
Grateful. Grateful. Grateful. I am.
asgr
Today, I said goodbye (see previous blog) to Carrie and Torin. Smart, sharp, organized, brilliant.....they are moving to a new location and new job. I was so struck by how I was not sad. I was not sad....why the heck not? My bagel buddy would not be in town. My stalwart truth teller would be emails away. How could I not be sad? Well, because I was too busy being grateful and full of love.
Awww, you say.
No. Really. Grateful for powerful friends. Grateful for the impact they will have on a new church, an old denomination, a dawning day for religio-spirituality. Big impact. Like a meteor. And now I have a nifty place to visit for long weekends.
So later in the day.....another good friend stopped by. She is vim and vigor personified. 'Nuff said.
So, later after that......my long time friend who lives 5 hours away sent emails as she wrote soul stirring prose for publication about suffering, lent, and a four-legged 3 pronged clay thing that represent her family. (go to catapult.com for her soon to be printed article)
Grateful. Grateful. Grateful. I am.
asgr
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
plucking bagels
Why is it that the best and most productive conversations happen at table? I'm not talking about the board table with stale donuts in the middle. But at the bagel shop. At the cafe'. At the local diner.
We order, we talk, we wipe our faces, we discuss. And in a span of just over an hour, topics go deep, real comments are made, and we touch truth.
It is best done where the food has been touched by chefs/cooks who care about those who partake of their culinary creations. But really, the kitchen table at home will do just fine.
When was the last time you had a conversation that talked about ideas and intent, and not just bottom lines and he said/she said?
......time to break out the bagels.
asgr
We order, we talk, we wipe our faces, we discuss. And in a span of just over an hour, topics go deep, real comments are made, and we touch truth.
It is best done where the food has been touched by chefs/cooks who care about those who partake of their culinary creations. But really, the kitchen table at home will do just fine.
When was the last time you had a conversation that talked about ideas and intent, and not just bottom lines and he said/she said?
......time to break out the bagels.
asgr
Monday, March 19, 2007
farewell to dear ones
....this week I must say goodbye to dear friends. They have done what they came to do: study, grow, have a baby. I love them three, and life will have an empty quality to it for a while. Sort of like when you buy a new house, and the first time you go in after the sellers have moved all of there stuff out, the house echos with lack.........
it will fill again, and i will go out to visit from time to time.......the echo will fade, and I'll get those nifty notices from Kodak to view their photo gallery.
Praise be.
asgr
it will fill again, and i will go out to visit from time to time.......the echo will fade, and I'll get those nifty notices from Kodak to view their photo gallery.
Praise be.
asgr
pondering the prodigal
Pastor Kelly preached a sermon on Sunday that kicked! As always. It was on the tried and tired Prodigal Son. Her emphasis was that of how confession and growth go hand in hand. At the end, she asked us who (in the story) needed yet to confess: the father for throwing a party? the stay at home son for being snippy? She always manages to bring a new light to scripture texts darkened with familiarity.
I want to ponder the prodigal a bit. The ending always receives short shrift. We've already had the full story of the son who leaves, debauches, regrets and returns. The father welcomes and throws a party. Any energy thrown the way of the stay-at-home son is usually casual and flippant. Well, why not? The stay at home son is whiny and a complainer. Poor sod. He worked and worked and never got what his brother received. Did he ever ask his father for a party? You have to wonder. I know I always asked my parents for things I wanted, knowing they would simply say "no" if they were not inclined to provide it.
It is the stark ending that pulls me in. Imagine.......a house, lit up, full of people, music, dancing.......and outside its dark. You can see the merriment through the windows, while the noises are muffled by the walls. Outside, only those on errands scurry about in the cool of the evening. The life is inside. The stay-at-home son is sulking, alone for a bit, outside. Refusing to go in.
Out comes the father. A father who is delighted at the return of his prodigal son. A father who is full of joy and emotion. A father who has two sons. The father comes outside of the party, leaving the life, the mirth, the joy, to stand in the darkness with the other son.
This is the point where it all freezes for me. Stilled to perfection. For if, in the parable, the father is to symbolize God, then God has just left perfect joy to stand with humanity in its self created hell of darkness.
And the story ends there. Out there in the darkness. It is not tidy or rosy....it just ends.
That is the power of the parable. Not simply the father's forgiveness for the wayward son, but for the commitment to stand outside of the party, in the pouty darkness, for as long as it takes. And this is the God I know and serve. This is the God who meets the needs of the deserving, and the needs of the entitled.
....this God who stands with me, with humanity, with creation for as long as it takes for us to get it. To get that the party is already on, and all we have to do is go inside. All we have to do is walk through the door.
asgr (with an appreciative nod to Robert Capon's exegetical work)
I want to ponder the prodigal a bit. The ending always receives short shrift. We've already had the full story of the son who leaves, debauches, regrets and returns. The father welcomes and throws a party. Any energy thrown the way of the stay-at-home son is usually casual and flippant. Well, why not? The stay at home son is whiny and a complainer. Poor sod. He worked and worked and never got what his brother received. Did he ever ask his father for a party? You have to wonder. I know I always asked my parents for things I wanted, knowing they would simply say "no" if they were not inclined to provide it.
It is the stark ending that pulls me in. Imagine.......a house, lit up, full of people, music, dancing.......and outside its dark. You can see the merriment through the windows, while the noises are muffled by the walls. Outside, only those on errands scurry about in the cool of the evening. The life is inside. The stay-at-home son is sulking, alone for a bit, outside. Refusing to go in.
Out comes the father. A father who is delighted at the return of his prodigal son. A father who is full of joy and emotion. A father who has two sons. The father comes outside of the party, leaving the life, the mirth, the joy, to stand in the darkness with the other son.
This is the point where it all freezes for me. Stilled to perfection. For if, in the parable, the father is to symbolize God, then God has just left perfect joy to stand with humanity in its self created hell of darkness.
And the story ends there. Out there in the darkness. It is not tidy or rosy....it just ends.
That is the power of the parable. Not simply the father's forgiveness for the wayward son, but for the commitment to stand outside of the party, in the pouty darkness, for as long as it takes. And this is the God I know and serve. This is the God who meets the needs of the deserving, and the needs of the entitled.
....this God who stands with me, with humanity, with creation for as long as it takes for us to get it. To get that the party is already on, and all we have to do is go inside. All we have to do is walk through the door.
asgr (with an appreciative nod to Robert Capon's exegetical work)
Monday, March 5, 2007
Plucking Blackberries
"Earth is crammed with heaven, and every common bush afire with God; But only the ones who see, take off their shoes. The rest sit round it and pluck blackberries." Elizabeth Barrett Browning
This blog is mostly for my personal journey through the mental and faith wanderings of a Doctor of Ministry program. I welcome all who wish to comment, correct, insult, laugh.......
My intent is to be too busy catching fire to the hem of my skirts, to be distracted by the blackberries.
But, Oh, sometimes, those succulent juices are sweeter than truth. To be redirected, enthralled, and filled up with the berries of life......
I guess I want both.
asgr
This blog is mostly for my personal journey through the mental and faith wanderings of a Doctor of Ministry program. I welcome all who wish to comment, correct, insult, laugh.......
My intent is to be too busy catching fire to the hem of my skirts, to be distracted by the blackberries.
But, Oh, sometimes, those succulent juices are sweeter than truth. To be redirected, enthralled, and filled up with the berries of life......
I guess I want both.
asgr
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